Possibly it is because the one-year mark is approaching (November 1). At this time last year I was trying to determine when I would have to head East to spend her last days with her.
Possibly it is because we both enjoyed the Fall so much, and this is the first year I cannot share that pleasure with her.
I can't put my finger on the "why" of it, but it's taken me completely off guard.
And I don't like it.
I desperately miss the grounding and re-orienting that I gained just from hearing her voice. It reassured me, at some fundamental level, that I am still me. That sounds silly, but you know what I mean. With that source of reassurance gone, I sometimes feel like I'm adrift far, far away from home.
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| Mom at 17 |
- Catherine
3 comments:
Oh, Catherine, I am so sorry. Not much else to say. I'll be praying for peace for you.
The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, And saves such as have a contrite spirit. -Psalm 34:18
Praying for you, Cath....
I'm sorry Catherine. I don't think you need a reason to feel what you feel. I'll be praying too.
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